Semi-Dark Room…

Sitting in a semi-dark room, wondering why I can’t do any of those things I want to do. I just woke up, so tiredness cannot be an excuse. It isn’t laziness either because I dusted that off a while ago.

But I can feel the slight irritation creeping up again. It is minute but it is there and it is crawling up and the fact that it is there is more annoying than anything else.

Several friends are getting married. And when i say “friends” i really do mean friends. Not someone whom I like and consider a pal. These are 4 AM people. And it surprises me how okay I am with all of that. I made my peace with my relationship status a little while ago. I realised when I say “I like being single,” I really do mean it. I have slight issues with commitment – the top one being that there are all these things I want to do and somehow it seems to be in a slightly different path than the ‘couple’ bit. Of course, in the meantime while I’m finding out what i want to do, if i find someone who is like me – i’m not that commitment phobic 🙂

I realised something late last night – Falling in love is not in your hands but what you do about it definitely is.

Which is why some people end up getting married, some break up and become morons.

I feel a lot lighter with these realizations. I am trying to find dresses for friends’ weddings now. I guess I have to add to my wardrobe now, considering my reluctance to wear saris. They just are not comfortable. And considering I’d attend on average 2 events a year, my wardrobe was suitably filled. Now, I guess once the engagements are over, there are weddings. Then there are kids born and ceremonies for them and so on.

Except right when it is time to go shopping, i’m broke. and my mom refuses to lend me any more money.

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