Slam Book

I came across my old ‘slam’ book today. The one that we filled in college…the final year. The ‘slam’ book is the Indian equivalent of the western Year Book. Except, this is not approved by the university and there isn’t a proper format… though we did that as well… an online edition… somewhere.

Except after the ridiculous printed book drama in high school, I decided to just get a plain one and get people to scribble whatever they wanted in it.

I made a book… colourful pages and bound.

I stopped going through the book a few years ago because it made me blue… seriously blue. But today I came across the book while cleaning and… I didn’t read every entry. Some of my favorite ones, I know the content in my heart. But flipping through it, it struck me how much we have all changed.

The people, the handwriting, opinions and even email IDs. Hell, half the people then had yahoo and hotmail. Gmail was still evolving. Now, everyone has gmail. If someone gives you a yahoo ID, you’ve to wonder how serious they are about communicating.

Yet, through it all, our personalities leaked through… the people who used special pens, stuck photos or other little things and decorated the page. The ones who drew cartoons or beautiful designs or were straight forward in saying “well too bad we didn’t really speak to each other much.”

Thanks to the internet, we have gotten to be friends… some of those people. And thanks to the internet, I have lost in touch with some others save the occasional comment on FB or a ping on gtalk.

I wonder if I had asked people also to write where they would see themselves 5 years from then, what would they have written? As I know it, most of us aren’t doing what we thought we want to do. And that is quite a statement considering we were graduating from college. There are photos of us – shockingly thinner people (most of us) with wilder hair. Now, there is a layer of polish for most of us, depending on the day you meet us.

We did have a mini reunion… and then, it didn’t seem like people have changed much. But perhaps I had blinders on that day… because hell yes we have changed! We are sleeker, smarter and warier. And we also realise the value of old friends and for most part, have learnt to let bygones be bygones.

A friend once said that if we managed to survive college, we could survive anything at all… to which another countered that college screwed us up so much that we just don’t have to worry about anything else.

Now, when I stand at crossroads yet again… I consciously have to choose which direction to go in. It makes me feel incredibly old and I’ve lived only for quarter of a century, and only half of that consciously. The choices I have made so far have been mostly instinctual. But instincts get a little dull when you are tired and that is the most dangerous time to make a decision.

Well, tomorrow is a new day and a new week… and hope it’ll be better than what went by.

Song of the day: Photograph – Nickelback 

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